September
1st
Mother allowed me to buy this blank notebook. What a fortune. Let’s start. School was fine anyway, I answered the hardest question correctly in mathematics. Maybe I need to write this down, because people in the future need to know what our lives were like in the old times. I’d like to write everything down, just in case of things embarrassing(of course, not those like being in a war or something).
4th
I heard that the Amiltons fired the Hermic ships. That was very dangerous. Although the Amiltons didn’t declare war on the Hermic, there is still a very high possibility that more conflicts are going to happen. Oh, by the way, I want to explain why I don’t write down my name. First of all, we are Lues, and I don’t want to put my parents or younger brother in danger. After all, if they find out about this book, they can only track it down to me. And, I shall laugh at you if you are a Hermic-Ishel officer, or whatever, because you are stupid. Blaming me won’t help after all. Moreover, I believe that people will return our justice to the next generation one day. Labouring and assaulting won’t work, though many of my generation don’t realize the fact that they are being controlled by the Ishels. Now, if you are the other case, a person who cares about history, let me tell you facts. There are countries fighting now, and the country I am now living in, Rowina, is captured by the Hermics. The Ishels hate us Lues, and they are the aristocrats of the Hermics. The Hermics claim they are the best country with intelligence, technology, and magic skills. We, Lues, on the other hand, held ancient skills in magic that, according to gossip, can undermine our status. Therefore, there are only two pathways. One is to stay in the country and forever obey them (and it is certainly not a good choice because I bet they use cruel methods to ask you to use those skills, then kill you). Two is to simply run as far as you can. The Amiltons don’t agree with the Hermics and want to fight them. Amilton recently, past four hundred years, had become an independent state after the war between Amilton and Erisque. Now, the Erisque and Amilton have become friends and fight together against the Hermics. Oh, Mother’s calling. I have to sleep.
6th
The Ishels found our school. I heard that on the same day, 6000 Lues are killed. What a good taste in the art of murder. Ishels suddenly had something on their mind and chose to come and inspect. Luckily, students are not at school, so we can just say we didn’t go to school. Of course, that is a risky choice, but…I would rather fight to my death than obey them(even if I need to cheat on them). As my predictions, the Ishels came and asked as if we attended any school, as they consider it as banned (because we are stupid and don’t deserve it?). I really want to laugh. I mean, I care about my race, but I really want to laugh. We ran here to hide away from the Ishels, but then what we are doing is simply throwing ourselves into their trap. We are locked up in what is so-called the forbidden area. By the way, I mentioned that I will fight to my death, but realistically, I think I am too weak and afraid to die. Plus, I don’t want to waste my life on things that won’t change ANYTHING.
7th
Fortunately, we have our own network of information, so they informed me that the Capital of Hermic was bombed by the Erisque. Too bad they didn’t bomb the Ishels all dead.
8th
Again, school’s fine. The Hermics are starting to siege Reinnlard, a city of Veits Union. Veits Union does not have a very good relationship with the Amiltons, though they are on the side of the Amiltons.
15th
The Hermics are creating nonsense again. They created a self-government and appointed someone in the army to become the head. What is the point of it? Additionally, they killed almost 3000 Lues because they ought to be moved to other places, and people disobey, which is why they’re shot. I know our fate, the next one is us. And if the Hermics’ military operation turns out badly, they will blame us. Why do I know? Because my classmate was shot. They shot her because she was meant to be sent to other places, but she refused. After watching her being shot, we then have to praise how tolerable the Hermic leader is for saving our lives from our stupidity. The Ishels, or Hermic, know that we disagree. I believe that to them, we are just toys that can be easily thrown away after feeling tired of us. We don’t have any values. Not even our skills, they forced us out the skills and teach them. On a chess board, we are not even a pawn, just the ranks and files stepped, ruined, and trampled on to guide them into the world of success. But we cannot cut ourselves out of this web of fate. Oh, how I wish that my parents were smart enough to run west, not east, to Erisque and even Amilton.
19th
We’ve been temporarily stopping school since I have memories, but today, the teacher announced that we will stop school forever, because they fear that soon the Hermic government will find out, and at that time, we will be killed just as other Lues. We don’t have to worry about numbers and alphabets, history, or other stuff anymore, but to us, it is also announcing that our date of death is near. Time will be seen as useless afterwards. You don’t realize what day, how many hours there are. You are just waiting, waiting for people to tell you: this is the time for you to end your life here. I don’t know what to say. Now my future is filled with nothing but darkness, loneliness, and fear. No, I don’t even see that a future is lying ahead. I only see incidents of how I can be dead in millions of ways…
28th
Another killing, with over 30000 sacrifices. The numb feeling towards these cold data… I don’t even know if I care about their death anymore, since the next one will be me. I don’t have much patience in writing my daily life as it is boring and I am just loitering around without any purpose. To you, I don’t know who you are, or might be, war is a terrifying word that is forbidden. But to me, or us, war is everyday. And I am only fourteen years old. I remember when I was only six years old, which is eight years ago, Mother and Father decided to take us here. Life back then in Hermic was great, with gourmet food and good friends. We used to play together at a park with our bicycles, chasing each other and playing hide-and-seek, as well as baseball. I wish I could go back in time and forever live in my past. Plus, I have to admit, no, you have to admit that we played with the Ishels. So, in my perspective, I fully don’t understand why the Ishels started to hate us. Maybe my younger brother would understand it, because he was born after we moved here. I do appreciate Father and Mother sensing the danger beyond the time. Just, why are we still moving to a place where we can be easily captured?
